In a world where traditions are constantly being challenged by modernity, mothers face the unique challenge of raising children who are both grounded in culture and adaptable to change. Exploring the balance between core values and the demands of today’s digital age can be particularly difficult yet rewarding, as communication, compromise, and media literacy play crucial roles in successful parenting in a rapidly evolving world.

Navigating the Challenges of Modern Parenting
Parenting is a unique experience for each mother. It comes with trials and tribulations, yet it can easily be one of the most rewarding experiences of one’s life. Today’s parents face a unique dilemma—the world is evolving at an unprecedented rate, with culture and tradition being thrown to the wayside. Children are much more aware of their identities, yet these identities tend to be confused due to the constant stream of content being thrown their way. So, how does a mother ensure that her children get the best of this modern world, while also holding onto their core beliefs and culture? This challenge holds especially true for military wives, who must raise their children in a way that allows them to fit in anywhere and overcome anything.
The Double-Edged Sword of Technology
The challenge of balancing modernity while maintaining traditional values is universal, but it is especially prevalent for military wives. Military children must pack up their lives every few years, moving from city to city and school to school. As a result, modern innovations like social media accounts and online forums have been increasingly significant for these children. These platforms are a double-edged sword. On the one hand, for a mother, it is important to recognise that these platforms can provide a universe of opportunities. They allow our children to maintain social connections that would have been otherwise lost. There are options for our children to complete their schooling online, eliminating the disruptive factor of joining a new school every other year, and adjusting to new teachers, social circles, and routines.
The Importance of Communication and Compromise
We cannot ignore the fact that these advancements have also brought about a cultural shift. Our children are living, breathing proof of this. New hegemonic belief systems are being constructed. We see this in the way our children speak, the way they dress, and most importantly the way they act. As Western beliefs begin to take over our children’s minds it is our responsibility to ensure that we maintain a balance. We cannot outright reject modernity. As the world advances, so should we. This is how we can give our children the best opportunities the world has to offer. But, we cannot simply accept an entirely new system; it is our responsibility to uphold the values and traditions upon which our society is built—through our children. To achieve this, it is important as a parent and as a mother, to develop media literacy. We must learn how new technologies function and understand the online space within which our children operate. Once we do this, we are better equipped to understand the way our children’s minds work. This is paramount to breaking down barriers in communication with our children and building stronger bonds. Learning to communicate better is the key to ensuring that we pass down our values in a way our children will respond to. Simply telling them what to do and how to act is not enough anymore. There will always be a need to compromise, a middle ground. Communicating with newer generations largely involves negotiation. We must learn to accept that we need to lose some battles to win the war. Once we find a middle ground, our children are much more receptive to accepting our words and values. We must use these instances to instill moral stability above all. Building a child’s character as they transition into an independent individual is the most important undertaking for any parent. Mothers must teach their children to be confident in themselves and their values. They must be upstanding individuals who can give back to their nation, and this responsibility falls on their parents—especially their mothers.
The Unique Struggles of Military Parenting
For military wives, managing parenting can be especially challenging because, often, at the most crucial developmental stages of a child’s life, fathers get posted to operation areas or non-family stations. In these instances, a wife must learn to manage raising children without a father figure present. She must take on the responsibilities and roles of both parents. While this is challenging, both parents must agree on how to ensure that a mother’s authority within the home is respected during such times. Women must, for the sake of their children, put on a strong face; they are the key to ensuring the emotional stability of their children during such periods.
Coping with Solo Parenting During Deployment
In the digital era, such emotional tolls can come with their unique sets of challenges and opportunities. As a military wife myself, it was eye-opening for me when I realised that the internet can be a tool during these times, too. There are never-ending resources available at the click of a button that can act as guides when one feels lost. There are resources for solo parenting, many of which are available within the frame of Islamic ideals and traditional values. Online articles, videos, and journals give us access to knowledge we may have never dreamed of accessing in our time. We can also use the experiences of other parents to ensure that we aren’t failing our children in any way during these difficult times.
Leveraging Digital Resources for Support and Connection
Platforms like Netflix or YouTube can even be used as bonding tools. In the absence of one parent, it is crucial to maintain the integrity of a family bond. Using digital platforms to plan activities such as movie nights with your children can be a way to achieve this. However, one can never be too careful. In times of emotional instability, there have been a plethora of cases where children seek emotional support from strangers online—often from those who do not have their best interests at heart. Once again, the key to avoiding this is fostering open communication within our homes. All things considered, modernity and the digital world do not have to be a threat to our ability to uphold our traditions and parent accordingly. If we take the time and effort to understand the advancing world in which our children thrive, it can become a gold mine for effective parenting. We can use it to understand our children better and overcome the hurdles that come with being part of a military family. The internet can provide mothers with more confidence in parenting and allow our children to gain a whole new world of opportunities. However, we must ensure that we do not let the world carry them away from the traditions and morals integral to them being a productive member of society.
Parenting Without a Manual: The Journey of Raising Unique Children
Having said all this, parenting does not come with a manual. Through my journey of raising four children, I believe it is not about being perfect; rather it is about being present. It is fascinating that my four children, despite sharing the same household, parents, rules, and circumstances have four different, distinct personalities. I believe it is my responsibility to define what is right and what is wrong, to foster a supportive environment, and then give them choices, trusting them in their decisions. I have always cherished my Army life despite the challenges faced, I'm always proud to be a part of this wonderful institution. In the end, I would say parenting is a journey without a one-size-fits-all manual. Every child is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. It is a learn-as-you-go adventure, filled with trial and error, intuition, and love. HH

The writer is a dedicated military wife and mother of four children, two daughters and two sons. She is qualified with a degree in English Literature.
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