Sitting with my laptop, my daughter sleeping peacefully next to me, I realize that this is the only time I truly find myself. The house is quiet, the day's chaos has settled, and for a brief moment, I simply exist. These late-night hours, when the world is still and my baby finally rests, are when I reflect the most on the kind of mother I am, the kind of mother I want to be, and the mother I lost before I even got the chance to ask her how she did it all.

Motherhood has been the most humbling experience of my life. It has stretched me in ways I never thought possible:
physically, emotionally, and mentally. And in these past few months, as I have navigated the whirlwind of postpartum, I have felt my mother's presence in ways I never expected. I understand her more with every sleepless night, every moment of doubt, and every sacrifice I make without a second thought. I see her not just as my mother but as a woman who once sat exactly where I am now, exhausted but in love, overwhelmed but fiercely devoted. I only wish I had understood all this when she was still with me.
The Loneliness of Postpartum in Today's World
Before I became a mother, I had this vague idea that postpartum is a difficult phase. However, I did not imagine just how hard it might be. It is not just the physical recovery, though it is brutal. It's the complete loss of self, the isolation, the way the world expects you to bounce back while you are still trying to figure out who you are.

My mother never had to deal with the pressures of social media or the unrealistic expectations placed on modern moms. Back then, postpartum was treated as a sacred time, a period of rest and recovery. There were grandmothers, aunts, neighbors, and women who surrounded new mothers with warmth, cooking meals, offering guidance, and reminding them they were not alone.

I did not have that. Many of us do not.
Instead, I scroll through Instagram and see moms who look like they have it all together, glowing, happy, and effortlessly balancing it all. Meanwhile, here I am, running on three hours of broken sleep, trying to convince myself that using dry shampoo counts as self-care. The truth is, today's postpartum experience is lonelier than it ever has been before. Although we are more connected than ever, we have never been more isolated.
Understanding My Mother's Sacrifices
Every night when I wake up to feed or soothe my daughter, I think about the countless nights my mother must have done the same for me. And not just in the first year but for years after that. I think about how often she must have put her own needs last, how many times she must have been exhausted but still showed up for me. And I wonder, did she ever feel unseen? Did she ever long for someone to acknowledge just how much she was giving?
I never thought to ask her.
When I was younger, I saw my mother as someone who always had everything under control. I never realized that maybe she was just really good at hiding the hard parts. Now that I am in her shoes, I wish I could tell her I see her now, that I understand, and I finally get it. But since I can't, I try to honor her in the best way I know how: by being the kind of mother she was!
The Weight of Modern Motherhood
One of the hardest things about being a mother today is the constant expectation to do everything. We are expected to be fully present, patient, and nurturing while maintaining a household, staying fit, keeping our careers afloat, and still finding time for ourselves. I think about how my mother raised me without all the noise. She did not have parenting blogs telling her she was doing it wrong. She did not have strangers on the internet making her question every decision. She just mothered. She relied on instinct, experience, and wisdom from generations before her. I envy that. Today, we have access to more information than ever before, but instead of making us more confident, it often makes us feel like we are failing. We compare ourselves to strangers on the internet. We question every little thing. And in the process, we forget that no amount of external validation will ever matter more than the love we pour into our children.
Finding My Own Way
Some nights, when my daughter finally falls asleep and the day's weight settles on my shoulders, I wonder if I am doing enough. If I am a good enough mother. If I am giving her everything she needs. And then she wakes up and reaches for me with those tiny hands, and at that moment, I know.
I may not always have it together. I may not have the support system my mother had. I may be unable to call her and ask her everything I wish I had. But I have her lessons, love, and strength woven into every part of who I am.

And now, I get to pass that love on to my daughter. A beautiful full-circle moment indeed!

To all the new moms navigating postpartum in today's fast-paced world: you are not alone. Motherhood may appear easy on social media, but like you, every mother is learning the ropes. Have faith in yourself, embrace your child's affection, and remember that you only need to be there and not flawless. Even on the most difficult days, you are doing enough and are everything for your child.

Motherhood is indeed hard. It is relentless. It demands more than you ever thought you had to give. But at the end of the day, when I look at my daughter, I realize I am doing exactly what my mother did before me. I am showing up. I love fiercely. And somehow, despite the exhaustion, I would not trade it for anything.

Because in the end, my mother was right: "This love, the kind that asks for nothing in return, is what makes it all worth it."

The writer is working as a social media strategist, and business development manager with nearly five years of experience in the field. As a new mom, she brings a unique perspective to her work, blending personal experiences with research and personal insights. Through her writing, she aims to spark meaningful conversations and provide support to mothers and women navigating the complexities of life.
Email: [email protected]